Focus on the Positive

Those who read this blog may notice I took a couple days off from writing. Rest assured it's Not because I haven't been doing my acting thing--it's actually quite the opposite of that. A lot of personal issues that I can't discuss on here at the moment have come up between me and, a major player in the game of me becoming an actor. Also, I've been taking in a lot of negative energy and my subconscious has began to look for proof of the negative which is not a good place to be. It causes me to put up my own excuses and justifications for things and doesn't allow me to look at the situation. SO! To get out of this groove, I'm gonna do something I like to call, Focus on the Positive. Ready to play?

So the idea of "Focus on the Positive" is where I list everything--no matter how small or how big--that has happened in the past 24-48 hours that is Positive. Easy as it seems, it's a good boost to train the thought process to look at the positive things, instead of taking a look at the negative things. So here i go naming all the positives that have happened in the past 24-48...

1. My dogs are healthy
   
2. My computer still works well
3. My car still works very well
4. I have been very successful at transitioning to NM
5. I have found a great supportive environment at Yoga
6. By admitting I'm an actor to those I meet, I've gained confidence in my own abilities as an actor
7. I completed my Demo Reel. =D
8. I got in last minute into Kathy Brink's Workshop this weekend
9. LeeAnn started a class so I can learn and grow in my acting
10. Jeanie is going above and beyond to help me tweak my Demo Reel and get new representation
11. I stood up for what I believe is right.
12. I made it through yoga for 10 days, and am on my second 10 day stretch
13. AND FEELING AMAZING THAT I CAN KEEP GOING!!
    
14. I lost 3 inches in my hips
15. I'm making a deeper connection with Kasha
16. The universe is helping to clean "house"--out with the bad, in with the good
17. Hot pockets are amazing--especially an hour before yoga
    
18. I have pictures of my doggies and Cute Xmas cards to send to everyone
19. I have a job--meaning I have incoming money
    
20. The Officer never turned in my speeding ticket, so it got dismissed.
21. I am fully running on Actors Access and on NowCasting
22. I am connecting deeper with my subconscious in order to not only perform better as an actor, but to help me in my day-to-day life interactions by trusting what's being felt.
23. I got my mail keys, so I can now check my mail!
24. I found an NM Agency that doesn't have my type!
25. The Yoga teacher helped me correct what I was doing wrong in class! Now I can feel the Burn!
    
26. I have an audition on Sunday (nov 22) For a game show host
    
27. I like sushi- Shrimp and California rolls for now....
28. I found my DVD remote--making it easier to watch dvd's from my bed!
29. I've done my breathing exercises that LeeAnn asked me to do everyday
30. I can still smile!

Wow... It was tough getting to 30, I breezed through 1-25, but it was hard coming up with those last few. Happy Days.

As I listed, I completed my Demo Reel to submit for work. I think it's great, a few people that I trust have said that it's pretty good! I know it'll be good enough to get me an agent, possibly a manager, and get me out for Pilot Season in Jan 2010.

I also have my profiles on ActorsAccess and NowCasting ready and have been submitting to things that are available on there. I don't have my reel available, but I might get lucky enough to get a gig or 2.

By the end of the year, I'm going to get new headshots. Now that I have this new training becoming more solid, my headshots'll be more powerful because I can pack everything in that's needed for a headshot. Then it's just a matter of who looks at me and what projects I can hop on and get a better reel. Then, I may be unstoppable, so watch out Acting World, Roe's comin!! Lol...

It's been interesting over the past few days since I've been in a slum. I picked up the book Personal Development for Smart People by Steve Pavlina and I thumbed through to find myself stopping at his chapter on Courage. It reminded me of how disconnected I was from myself before I decided to embark on this journey of the heart/passion/purpose.

"If you want to leave an unfulfilling relationship, quit an uninspiring job, or restore an unfit body to a state of health, the long-term outlook may look wonderful, but you can also expect short-term challenges as you transition."
~Steve Pavlina, 102.

In a way, I'm experiencing those short-term challenges. I'm choosing to think that I am passing, with flying colors, at these challenges. And, I am so glad I took the courage I had and am using it for this opportunity. I often wonder why people discouraged me from taking this jump. Even some people in my immediate family tried to project what they thought this attempt would do to me. Why would you want to discourage me from having this moment of happiness? Also, why not do this now, while I have less commitments, less responisbilities, and more time to bounce back if I fail?

In one of the exercises Jeanie had us do over the weekend, she made some points that opened my eyes a bit. She had us write a letter to the substitution with the scene objective we had in mind. In her example, she said "my life began when you died." I believe my life began when I triumphantly crossed the New Mexico Border. She said a few more things that really opened my eyes and want to say, "wow, how can someone say they love you, but then do everything possible to hold you back from what may be the best thing to bring you happiness." Maybe someday I'll understand... It has something to do with projecting a belief from one's subconscious mind.

Well, I wrote a lot. And Tomorrow I have off but I am meeting with Jeanie to go through my Demo Reel and I have LeeAnn's Acting class. I should be receiving my script for Saturday's Kathy Brink's workshop so I'll be breaking that down soon. But in the mean time, I'm gonna go to bed. So on that note... final words will be from, Steve Pavlina:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"When we creatively express ourselves, we're honestly sharing what's most important to us. This act of sharing connects us with others and offers them a glimpse of truth."
~Steve Pavlina